Ramblings on a very wild and stormy day....

Random .. intuitive and chaos.. are three words in the Modern Western world that are greatly feared and loathed! More and more in our neatly ordered society we try to control, manipulate and contrive. We hate the unexpected in a world growing more and more complex. The desire to destroy any form of chaos and place a hard rigid order to keep things in check. What an illusion this all is! Our growing arrogance and feelings of superiority that we are no longer part of nature that its entirely there at our disposal to manipulate in whatever way suits our interests best. I am very adaptive to change and realize the temporary nature of all things, and our reactions as a society today are more and more reactionary, often narrow in insight and often quite irrelevant in outcome

Our governments work in similar reactionary ways, dictated by obsessive fears and phobias rather than really concentrating on issues that really determine the quality of existance for man and all other centient objects and living organisms. Nothing is more classic than the "War of Terror". We are spending countless billions on this intangible fear, in a world dictated by the irrational . Little do we realise we are "polishing the silver as the Titanic goes down". We pay total lip service to the real causes of death destruction and pain.. such as poverty, climate change, pollution, environmental destruction. They are to big to complex and dont require simplistic band aid solutions, they involve a total rethink in the way we live our lives and react to the world we live in. Its easy then to find scapegoats in this reactionary world.. the Bin Ladins.. rather than the underlying causes of disenfranchisement, alienation anger and frustration at the big picture. How many die from Terrorism in the West compared to getting in the car to go to the supermarket everyday, yet most at totally fearless when we get behind the wheel. A visit to Sub Saharan Africa.. or the Indian Subcontinent is a classic case of living chaos... the psyche is much more capable in that cultural system with its beliefs steeped in the philosophies of Buddhism, Hinduism and even true Islam! at being able to deal with it all. .. Inshallah... god willing (doesnt that say it all ... much is in the lap of the gods rather than tiny egos trying desperately to determine an outcome.
I have a strong right hemispheric dominance and strong visual preference .. i suppose in my own chaotic manner I never really thought of myself as an artist.. or in terms on any label really. I have been just happy 2 "be". I suppose I dont make the distinctions in my own head about my creative and artistic abilities.. they are just part of the whole just another form of expressing myself. Being a very sensual communicative and demonstrative being it just finds myriad ways of expressing itself. My organizations skills are like wise seemingly very unstructured. This total lack of regard for convention makes many dispair and uneasy as i just "dont quite fit" as so much of my life is seemingly random, chaotic and intuitive in its approach. They are skills long since lost that our Judeao-Christian belief system and its seemingly more and more remote abstract distant and irrelevant institutions have ingrained upon us. We have lost touch with who we are and what we really need ... and the consumeristic juggernaut powers on swallowing us whole creating a reactive world, not one that that is intuitive.
We live in a world today that worships speciality and narrowing converging goals. I have always bucked the trend to be able to multi task and simultaneous operate on several different planes at once and to have a practical and adaptive intelligence and optimize any situation rather than specific and narrow approach. This enables the ability to deal with the random.. the intuitive and chaotic and to think totally out of the square that we are constantly pushed into. My own nagging medical condition Multiple Sclerosis is by its very nature chaotic and often its effects seemingly only have tenous connections to action and reaction. This requires a very intuitive and rapid response to the chaos it provides. A life that is neatly ordered planned and contructed quickly falls apart under such conditions, requiring constant adaptation and creative reorganization and often a simple ability to just let go, and go with the flow. To ride out the storm and let go.. be abandoned to the chaos and the random, feeling secure in the idea you have the emotional and spiritual skills to deal with whatever may transpire.. For me simply ..... Living-is-Art!